


Second Chances

by xserenity



Category: Batman (Comics), Batman - All Media Types, Grayson (Comics), Nightwing (Comics), Red Hood and the Outlaws (Comics)
Genre: Age Regression/De-Aging, Angst, Batdad, Brothers, Faked Death, M/M, Pre-New 52, de-aged Dick, fight
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-02
Updated: 2017-05-02
Packaged: 2018-10-26 19:48:25
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,150
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10793538
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xserenity/pseuds/xserenity
Summary: Jason was pissed at Dick, for lying to him, for faking his death. He didn’t plan on forgiving him ever. But of course, things never go as planned.





	Second Chances

“I don’t want to talk to you.”

Jason crossed his arms over his chest and narrowed his eyes at the person before him, glaring at his so called ‘dead’ son-of-a-bitch lying boyfriend – ex-boyfriend that is.

With guilt clearly reflected in his eyes, Dick parted his lips to speak, frowning and begging that he can explain but Jason stomped his foot, holding his ground. Not this time. Dick wasn’t going to get his way. An apology wasn’t going to cut it.

“Come on Jason, please just let me explain!”

 _“Fuck off_ Grayson. I have nothing to say to you,” he growled, grinding his teeth in anger.

Dick seemed taken aback as his shoulders slumped, eyes flickering to the ground, breaking their gaze. A soft sigh escaped his lips before he placed his attention back on the taller male. His eyes glistened, seeming as if he was on the verge of tears, guilt written all over his face. He knew he was wrong, and he was trying to mend things.

Jason knew the reason. He heard it from Dick when he came back to ‘life.’ That one time he punched him so hard in the face because he was _so_ angry. Just thinking about it made his stomach tighten, hands clenching into tight fists, fury boiling within him.

“Jay – “

“ _No._ You don’t get to apologize. You fucked up.” Jason said, raising an accusing finger at him.

“But – “

“Fuck you! You _lied_ to me! I mourned your death! I cried for you! Fuck – I…” Jason shouted, raising his voice, feelings welling within him. He took a moment to breath, running his fingers through his hair, pulling distressingly at his dark locks. Dick doesn’t know how much it hurt. How broken he was when he found out he’d died. Even worse when he went to his ‘funeral.’

Jason had always loved and admired Dick from his Robin days. Even after he came back to life, he couldn’t forget him. He was so fucked up but Dick always tried to bring him back, always tried to help him. It took so long to put himself back together, to get him to dial down on his anger, so long to become friends again and then finally, lovers. And he’d enjoyed their time so much, and then when Dick ‘died,’ Jason was devastated.

How could Dick and Bruce do such a thing? Even if Dick had argued that it was Bruce’s idea and the fact that he had to go join Spyral to protect the superheroes’ identities. To protect him and the family.

He still could have at least told the family because they deserved to know. The secret would have been safe with them but _no_. Bruce thought it was better to not let as many people know.

“I’m sorr – “ Dick started but was quickly interrupted.

“Didn’t I say you don’t get to apologize to me? So shut the fuck up _Richard_. I’m done with you. You lied to me. You faked your death. I believed you were dead! You completely broke my trust!”

“But I _had_ to,” Dick argued.

“You could have told me!”

“But – “

“Yeah. I get it. _Bruce._ Well fuck him too. But I’m angrier with you. We were dating.”

“We are dating.”

“No we aren’t. Not anymore.”

And suddenly, Dick’s face turned upside down as if the world had crashed. It hurt Jason, squeezed at his heart to see such a sorrowful expression on that beautiful face. He still loved him, of course he did. He always would but he couldn’t forgive him. He just can’t bring himself to forgive Dick. His anger burned and it was going to take a while to die down.

“Are you – “

“Yeah. I’m serious. I don’t want to see your face anymore. _Or ever._ Get the fuck out of here Dick.” Jason said and quickly turned on his heels, back facing towards Dick. He couldn’t look at him any longer. He’d waver if he looked at that saddened face. He never liked seeing that expression on his pretty face but he deserved it.

Jason closed his eyes and waited for Dick to leave his door step.

He could hear Dick breathing heavily. “I-I’m sorry,” his voice trembled, sounding wet. Was he crying? “I-I’ll go. You won’t ever see me again Jason.” Fuck, yeah, Dick was crying. He could tell by the way his breath hitched.

Jason still didn’t turn around and listened as Dick walked away, the footsteps getting further and further until he couldn’t hear anymore.

He slammed his door shut, and locked it. Jason walked right over to his couch and collapsed onto the cushions with a loud thud. He swung his arm over his eyes, trying to hold in the prickling tears threatening to fall.

There went his only love.

He could have forgiven him. It would have been so easy. It was Dick after all. But every time he thought of how he had lied to him, he just couldn’t bring himself to do it. He’d end up yelling at Dick, would probably end up hating him.

He knew he was harsh but he had to be. He had to make it clear because Dick kept visiting him and trying to mend things. He didn’t want to push him away completely but he needed the distance.

It would do him some good, help him clear his mind.

“Fuck,” he swore. Jason hoped he wouldn’t regret his decision in the end.

\------ 

A few months had passed since his official break-up with Dick. He was still mad about it so in order to not think about him, Jason kept himself busy.

True to his words, Dick never showed his face again. He didn’t bother Jason, never sought him out. They didn’t run into each other while on patrol. He didn’t even hear about any sightings of Nightwing or anything. It was like, he just disappeared.

Bruce never said a word because he probably knew it’d piss him off. Tim never mentioned Dick either, though Jason hasn’t seen him much since he’s been busy with the Titans. Though the younger was quicker than Jason to forgive Dick. It wasn't immediate but it did take a while.

Of course Damian forgave Dick instantly. But not like Jason ever interacted with the brat. He did run into him on occasion but he’d never piped a word about Golden Boy either.

They probably knew better than to mention Dick in front of Jason.

But Jason couldn’t help but wonder where the fuck he’d gone to?

“Fuck, I need to not think about him.” Jason frustratingly tried to clear his mind. Every so often, he’d think about Dick because that man was always lurking in the back of his mind.

He drove his bike into the batcave and parked it, before heading up to the mansion. He needed some information from Bruce on a mission he’d been working and figured he’d grab some breakfast because he couldn’t resist Alfred’s cooking.

As he entered the kitchen, he found the man in question sipping coffee and reading news feed on his tablet at end of the dining table, his designated seat. Alfred was setting the table with a plate of pancakes and other nutritious food.

“Hey Alfred,” Jason greeted with a grin.

“Master Jason, what a surprise. Care to join us for breakfast?”

Jason shrugged and took a seat to the right of Bruce, but one chair away from him. They certainly weren’t close like his Robin days but were on better terms.

“Bruce,” Jason greeted.

“Jason,” he grunted, returning the favor and met his eyes briefly before turning his attention back to his device.

Jason rolled his eyes but watched as Alfred brought a plate of his own breakfast and set it down before him with a mug of coffee. It smelled so heavenly. He picked up a fork and dove right in.

As he ate, he watched as Bruce set the tablet down and began to eat his breakfast. The both of them ate in silence, before Jason decided to interrupt their almost too comfortable atmosphere.

“Bruce. I need some info on the case I’m working.”

“We can take a look at that after we – “

Out of nowhere, Jason heard a loud scream and he stopped his movements. He listened again and there was another scream, it sounded like a child.

“What the fuck?!” Jason immediately placed his attention on Bruce, staring him in the eye.

Alfred had already left the kitchen, and Jason could only assume he was heading towards where the screaming came from.

“What was that?”

“Nothing of your concern.”

“Bullshit. That sounded like a kid. Holy fuck, you did not just pick up another kid did you?”

Bruce narrowed his eyes at Jason, his _‘really?’_ look clearly plastered on his face. Guess not but then who the hell could it be? It was definitely not Damian. The kid wasn’t even home. He’s been on some, adventure of some sort. Plus it sounded too young and nothing like the brat anyways.

“Well then, who is it? Or what I guess?”

Bruce ignored Jason and didn’t answer his question which ticked him off. Jason stood up from his seat, ready to go see for himself what this commotion was but he heard loud footsteps coming his way, sounding as if this person was running, well probably was running.

Suddenly, there was a child in the kitchen. A young kid who was wrapped in a fluffy blanket that hung on around his shoulders with the front tugged tight at his chest. Tears were streaming down his face, eyes red and snot dripping down his nose.

“Bruce! You weren’t there when I woke up!” He immediately ran up to Bruce and threw himself at the older man, climbing into his lap. The child wrapped his arms tightly around Bruce's neck and buried his face against his shoulder.

Jason was confused as hell and taken aback when Bruce returned the hug, holding the child close. His grip was so tight that it made Jason feel weird, questioning his reaction. He looked so… emotional in his actions. And Bruce wasn't one to reveal his feelings often.

“What the fuck?”

Bruce glared at Jason. “Language.”

“Who cares about that?!” He shouted, crossing his arms. “I want to know who that is.”

Bruce lets out a deep breath and pinched the bridge of his nose. “It’s complicated.”

“I don’t care. Who is it? Another secret child?”

“It’s Dick.”

“Har har. Funny Bruce.”

“It’s really Dick.”

“Last time I checked, Dick wasn’t some kid. Pretty sure he’s an adult.”

Bruce let out another sigh, seeming to be quite distressed. He gently brushed his hand through the child’s hair and leaned down to whisper something in his ear. The child sniffled and slowly unlatched himself from the older man. Bruce held him by the waist and turned him around in his lap so that he was sitting comfortably and facing Jason.

Jason stared at him and as he examined the child, he knew immediately that it was indeed Dick. He looked exactly like nine year-old Dick. He’d never forget that face or his eyes, those gorgeous innocent blue eyes. He was surprised he hadn’t caught it at first but only because he was too shocked.

And fuck, he was adorable. Eyes all puffy and watery.

“How?”

“He was working on a case and got doused with some potion and it turned him into a child.”

“What?”

As Jason was trying to take this all in, Alfred passed by him. The butler walked over with a tissue in hand and wiped Dick’s nose and face clean while he was still sitting in Bruce’s lap. That’s right, Dick was the only one who had enough courage to affectionately latch onto the big scary Batman.

“Bruce!” He heard Dick pipe up, voice all squeaky and young, nothing like the adult he is – well was. He’s not used to hearing this. “You left me alone! Why would you wake up before me?”

This really confused Jason. What did little Dick mean by that?

“Sorry Dick. Work called.”

Dick grumbled and mumbled something about how he was scared. Scared of what?

Bruce gently stroked his hair, trying to console the teary-eyed boy. They were completely in their own world. Dick didn’t even notice that Jason was here.

Suddenly, Bruce’s cell phone rang, vibrating against the table and he picked it up. Must be work related. They waited a few minutes as Bruce finished up his call and hung up. He let out a sigh and turned to look at Dick. “It’s work. I have to go.”

“What?! No!” Dick cried and latched onto his arm, gripping tightly.

“Dick…” Bruce warned.

“No Bruce! Don’t go!”

Bruce picked the boy up and off his lap. He kindly placed his hand on Dick’s shoulders and steered him towards Jason.

Jason stared at him with a confused look.

“Take care of him.”

“No.” He immediately said at the same time as Dick.

“Come on Dick.”

Dick clung to his arm, like a needy child and stared up at Bruce with his puppy dog eyes and pouty lips. “Please stay!”

“I can’t. You’ll have to stay with Jason.”

“I don’t want to!”

“ _Dick._ ” Bruce had lowered his voice, using his Batman growl. “Be good and stay with Jason.”

He pouted but nodded his head and mumbled a ‘fine.”

“ _Good_. Now, meet Jason. He’ll take care of you. And Jason, watch Dick carefully.”

Jason was about ready to just dip out, already back pedaling, distancing himself from the mess he found himself in.

“Jason.”

“No Bruce. I really can’t.”

“Jason I need you to watch him.”

“Alfred can do it.”

“Alfred is coming with too.”

“What? Why?”

“He needs to run errands.”

“No Bruce. I am not doing this.”

But Bruce didn’t hear any of it as he already left behind a sobbing attached 8 or 9 year-old with a stranger he didn’t even know. What the fuck is Bruce thinking?

And now it was just him and Dick in the house. Great. _Just great._

Jason didn’t know what to do and he really didn’t want to be here. He considered leaving Dick by himself. He’s a kid vigilante, he can take care of himself just fine. Because fuck, even if this wasn’t his Dick, the kid still brought up memories in him.

Jason turned around to leave, set on just disappearing. But he felt Dick grab onto his shirt, tugging him back.

“Where are you going?”

Jason looked down at the child, big blue eyes staring at him with worry. Why was he so worried? Wasn’t Dick supposed to be a perky, mischievous child filled with energy? This was odd.

He couldn’t very well say he was going to leave so he came up with an excuse. “Just the bathroom.”

“Oh.” Dick said and let go of his shirt.

Jason wore his best fake smile. “Just go sit in the room there and I’ll be back.” He pointed towards the living room. Dick nodded and scurried away. At least he listened.

Once Dick was out of the room, Jason quickly bolted to the grandfather clock, entered the cave and headed to where his bike was parked. _Fuck Dick._ _Fuck Bruce._ _Fuck all of this._ He was so not babysitting his ex-lover turned child.

Jason swung his legs over his bike and turned the engine on, ready to speed out of there but when he got a look at the computer, he could see the security cameras displayed on the screen. He found Dick in one of them, sitting alone on the sofa, swinging his legs back and forth. Now that he got a good look at the boy, he noticed Dick was wearing a too big shirt for his tiny body. It was hanging off his shoulders and dragged past his knees. Now that he thinks of it, maybe Alfred went to get clothes for Dick. Because who knows how long he was going to stay this way.

The longer he watched Dick, the more his chest tightened with guilt. He couldn’t just leave a scared and defenseless child alone in a big empty mansion. Even if he was mad at Dick, he’d never be able to live with himself if he somehow got hurt.

He groaned and shut off his bike. “Damn it.” There was no way out of this now.

Jason went back up to the manor and entered the room. Dick immediately turned to look at him, most likely hearing his footsteps approaching. The child stared at Jason and didn’t usher a single word. The older man didn’t know what to say so he just walked over and sat beside Dick.

He examined the child from the corner of his eye, could see how small and scrawny he was. He did remember Dick being kind of thin before he bulked up. But of course, he was still growing.

Jason let out a sigh, frustrated. He couldn’t stay mad at Dick. At least not this version of him because technically, he didn’t do anything wrong.

He noticed that Dick had stopped staring at him and instead, had his attention on his feet. He was playing with his toes, curling them and uncurling them. He also noticed how the child was shivering.

Jason got up from his seat and left the room to go retrieve the blanket Dick had been using earlier. He re-entered the room and draped the fluffy fabric over his shoulder and wrapped it tight around his body before sitting back down next to him.

Dick turned to look at Jason, eyes wide and a brilliant blue. Wow, he surprisingly missed those eyes but he found himself unable to look Dick directly in the eye. He was just too innocent and Jason forcefully turned his head away.

“Thanks.” Dick mumbled quietly.

Jason grunted in reply.

“Say… I’ve never met you before.”

“Yeah. I know.”

“But you seem familiar.”

“Well we’ve met but maybe not this version of you. Has Bruce told you anything?”

Dick nodded. “Yeah. He told me I got zapped into a 9 year-old by some potion and I was actually like, 20 something years old.”

“What else?”

“ _Um._ Something about how there were other Robins? Just in case I happen to meet them but he didn’t really say much. But I didn’t think someone would take over Robin after me.”

Jason snorted and Dick raised a brow at him.

“What was the last thing you remember?”

“Well, that would be my first year as Robin!”

 _Oh._ So he was pretty new to the vigilante business and that meant he hasn’t stayed long with Bruce either. Jason vaguely remembered details about Dick’s first year as Robin. Something about him being a bit of a problem child and going off on his own, getting hurt by Two Face and then fired and then running away. Then Batman had to go bring him back.

“That it?”

“Yep!” He chirped, seeming to be in a better mood now.

Jason watched from the corner of his eye as Dick fidgeted in his seat, seeming as if he wanted to ask something but wasn’t quite sure.

“Um…” He started. “So uh. Where do you fit in all this?”

Oh. He wanted to know more.

Jason didn’t want to get into too much detail about everything so he explained a bit to Dick about himself, how he became Robin, then glossed over his death and jumped straight to Tim and Damian. Giving him a bit of information about their weird family.

He seemed confused and bewildered as he took in all the information. Occasionally making surprised expressions or ones that looked a little distressed. Especially when Jason had mentioned he died, the boy appeared to be sad. And then he griped about how Bruce couldn’t just hand off Robin to everyone else when Robin belongs to him, but then Jason explained that Dick passed Robin down to Tim and Damian. And eventually to him as well. Though at first, Bruce had made him Robin.

That seemed to make him feel better. Jason didn’t tell him too much since he wasn’t going to stay in that form forever. Only until Bruce figured out how to turn him back. Which could be a week or a few weeks. Still…

Jason didn’t want to explain Dick’s life story. And it was better that he didn’t know as much anyways.

Dick was also really surprised at the fact that Bruce has a son and really insists that they meet sometime. And well, wouldn’t that be interesting?

“You’ll meet him soon enough.”

“Yeah?” He asked, eyes sparkling.

“Yeah. Now, how about we kill some time by watching TV?” Jason said as he reached for the remote controller resting on the table beside the couch.

“Okay!”

Jason turned the TV on and found some show that Dick would be interested in watching. They sat in complete silence, only the sounds from the TV resonating within the room. They decided to watch Criminal Minds since Dick loved detective stories because of course he would.

After an hour or two, the boy started to doze off, his head swaying back and forth. Eventually, his body fell against Jason and his head slumped against his arm.

Jason almost reflexively pushed Dick off but when he turned to look at the boy beside him and noticed his peaceful resting face, he couldn’t do it. He let out a sigh and re-positioned himself so Dick was resting more comfortably against him.

Nine year-old Dick Grayson was seriously messing with Jason’s feelings and he didn’t know what to do. He knows this wasn’t the Dick he’s mad at because this is technically a Dick Grayson who hadn’t done anything to him yet. But still, he couldn’t help but be angry whenever he thought of Dick. This child was so innocent and yet so Dick Grayson, that it stirred up feelings within him.

Jason decided that once Bruce was back, he’ll just dump Dick back in his hands and never come back until it’s all been fixed and Dick was gone once again.

Yeah. That’s what he’ll do.

As Jason was deep in thought, a tiny whimper interrupted him. He turned to his side and found Dick whimpering and clawing at something, arms flaying as if he was trying to push something away. He was having a nightmare. Which, would be normal for anyone in their business. He knew that the older Dick tended to have nightmares on occasion.

But a nine year-old having a nightmare? That’s just – that’s just not right. He was so young, and he’d only been crime fighting for a year and well, the more Jason thought about it, the more that it made sense for Dick to suffer from nightmares. Despite being a happy go lucky kid. His parents just died and then he got involved with the Batman. Of course a lot of things have happened to him.

It made Jason’s heart clench when he saw how distressed Dick look, his furrowed brows and trembling lips and how sweat was accumulating on his forehead.

Jason brought a hand down and gently caressed his hair, threading his fingers through the soft raven locks, like how he often did when he’d console Dick from his nightmares. He leaned down and whispered tenderly to him.

“It’s okay Dick,” Jason spoke softly. “You’re fine. I've got you.”

He continued to stroke his hair and lull him away from the monsters eating at his dreams, until Dick had calmed down.

This brought back old feelings Jason had been trying to hide, to deny; but being in this situation, even if it was a younger Dick, did things to him.

Dick was going to be the death of him and if he kept this up, he might end up forgiving him. So Jason had to get as far away as he could.

\------ 

As it turned out, as much as Jason tried to stay away, he found himself back at the manor. At first, he was determined to not visit little Dick at all, and it worked. That is until, Tim started sending him pictures of the adorable little boy.

Tim and Damian had heard of the news and returned home immediately. Unlike himself, Tim and Damian had forgiven Dick. Well, Damian forgave him instantly and with Tim, it took a little while for his anger to subside but he eventually forgave Dick and came to an understanding with him.

With Dick turned into a child, there was no way those two would be missing this opportunity to meet Dick’s younger self. Of course, Tim was a huge fan of Dick in his Robin days and most definitely took advantage of this.

At first they were simple texts such as ‘He’s so cute!’ and ‘He’s such a talker! Never shuts up!’ and ‘Oh my god, why can’t Dick just stay cute forever?’

Those texts were fine. They tempted Jason because who the fuck doesn’t love an adorable child Dick Grayson? He’s lovable and just like his older self but much more innocent.

After a few days, Tim started sending him pictures. Pictures of Dick in his cute Batman pajamas or Robin ones (courtesy of Alfred). Or him napping and drooling. Or him eating and making a mess of himself. And that child-like smile. It just tugged at Jason’s heart but he promised himself that he wouldn’t go back.

But the day he broke his promise was when Tim sent him a video, a video of Dick asking where Jason was and that he really wanted to see him.

 _Fuck_. Jason could never resist Dick and how the hell was he going to resist a nine year-old version of him?

That wasn’t happening.

So now, Jason found himself back at the manor, again, for the fourth consecutive day. It’s been about a week or so since Dick has been turned into a kid.

Bruce had reached out to certain Justice League members for diagnosis on Dick’s current situation. According to Zatanna, it’s not life threatening and he should be back to his normal self shortly. She said it could be anywhere between one to three weeks.

So all they could do was just wait.

Dick really warmed up to Tim and Damian, always hugging them and bugging them for attention. And surprisingly, Damian had also taken a liking to Dick as well, and calling him little Grayson even though he wasn’t that much smaller than himself.

It was interesting watching them interact, how Damian tried to act as the ‘older’ one and gave Grayson pointers and tips wherever he saw fit.

Tim as well would spoil Dick rotten, always letting the boy have his way. It might be due to the fact that he was the third youngest of the bunch and with Damian being an evil little child, little Dick would be the adorable younger brother everyone loved.

And well, they all did love him. So Jason can understand why Tim would spoil Dick and dote on him. Even though he did the same with older Dick, creating that brotherhood. But with their roles reversed, it was different. Instead of Dick being the big brother, now it was Tim’s turn.

And well, Tim seemed to enjoy taking care of Dick.

Of course, Tim and Damian still didn’t get along but well, they were cooperating since Dick would demand the both of them to play with him. Like, playing video games or going to places. And because they both wanted to spend time with Dick, they decided to put up with each other.

Which Jason found hilarious, seeing the scowls on their faces.

Either Dick was oblivious or he was trying to make them get along. Jason wouldn’t doubt the latter since that kid is a smart one and a little mischievous.

Dick would every so often poke at Jason for attention as well. Always jumping onto his lap or hugging him from behind. It did things to Jason but he couldn’t ignore it so he relished in the adoration which he dearly missed because his own Dick would have done the same. Always searching for body contact whenever he could, whether it be their knees touching at the dining table or snuggling.

Today, they decided to watch movies.

Lucky for Jason, Dick decided to sit with Tim. Damian was very upset the child didn’t pick him to share a seat with. Dick offered that Damian share the couch with him to which he declined because Tim was also there.

So the seating arrangement went something like this: Tim and Dick sharing a sofa together while as Damian and Jason got their own private seats.

Dick had a blanket snuggled around himself and was pressed close against Tim, leaning his head against the teen’s shoulder.

“Warm?” Tim asked.

“Yep!”

“Good.”

They watched a series of movies, mainly ones that Dick had picked out because well, he’s a child and they had to pick appropriate movies. So the movies were anything PG and under, and Dick’s choice had mainly been Disney films. Damian had almost wanted to argue against that but Dick’s pouty lips won him over.

Everyone had fallen asleep after a few movies, except for himself and surprisingly Dick. Nightfall was already here and it was time for Jason to go.

Jason got up from his seat and immediately, Dick piped up.

“Where are you going?” He asked, blue eyes staring straight at him.

“Home,” Jason answered as he walked by Dick and ruffled his hair. “See you later squirt.”

Dick grabbed onto his sleeve. “Don’t go. Stay.”

“Come on Dick. You know I have to go home.”

“No you don’t! You can just stay the night here.”

Jason stared at the child with big puppy eyes. He didn’t know why he wanted him to stay so badly. “Why?”

“I-I just want you to.”

Jason sighed. One night couldn’t hurt. “Fine.”

“Yay! You can have breakfast with us then.”

Jason rolled his eyes. “Was that your true intention?”

Dick giggled and let go of Jason’s sleeve only to hold onto his hand. “Maybe.”

Jason was shocked by the sudden action but it wasn’t anything new. Little Dick would often grab Jason’s hand when he wanted to drag him around somewhere.

Dick got up carefully from his seat so as to not disturb Tim and led Jason away from the room and into the kitchen.

“What are we doing here?”

“Snack!” He chirped. “Make me hot chocolate?”

God, Dick was always such a ball of energy.

Jason shook his head at him. “Alright. As long as you don’t tell Alfred.”

Dick grinned and nodded. “Yes!”

Jason brought out the ingredients to make hot chocolate and directed Dick to sit still in the chair. He could watch as he made it but he didn’t want a mess so he told Dick to behave, which the kid agreed.

After he finished making the sugary drink, he handed a mug to Dick and also slid a small pill.

Dick's eyes went wide and he stared at the tiny tablet. “What’s that?”

“Medicine.”

“But why?”

“You’ve been a little under the weather Dick. Even though you’re always full of energy. Take one and it should make you feel better.”

Dick scrunched his nose and continued to stare at the pill as if it was offending him. “Can I not?”

Jason raised a brow at him. “Why not?”

Dick frowned and furrowed his brows. “I don’t like pills.”

“Oh?” Now that was strange. He knows as a kid they were trained to learn how to swallow pills because of painkillers they took due to injuries. It’s not as if Dick would have not been taught that unless he just never liked them.

“I can’t take them.” Dick elaborated and he seemed really upset or possibly frightened? His small hands were trembling a little bit and Jason almost felt bad for putting him in this position.

“Why not?”

Dick paused for a moment and didn’t say a word. He kept his eyes downcast and stared down at the table. “…scared.”

“Hm?”

“I’m scared. It…scares me. Feels like, I might… I don’t know. Choke on it?” Dick tried to explain his fears and he looked really uncomfortable and Jason suddenly felt awful for pushing him. He wasn’t sure what was up with Dick but it appeared as though he didn’t like pills.

“Okay. I’ll give you the childproof kind, the liquid.” Jason took the pill back and headed towards the medicine cabinet.

“Ew,” Dick said and stuck out his tongue.

“It’s not that bad. Just take it quickly and then you can have hot chocolate.” Jason said and poured the right dosage into the tiny cup.

“Fine.”

Dick quickly downed his medicine and grabbed the cup of hot chocolate. He got up from his seat and grabbed onto Jason’s hand to drag him back to the room. He plopped himself right onto Jason’s lap and sipped at his chocolatey confectionary and finished the rest of the movie before heading to bed.

Jason stayed in the guest room he sometimes crashes at after a tiring night of vigilantism or if he’s been too knocked up on drugs due to his injuries. His old room, the one from his Robin days, was still there and he knew Alfred often kept it clean but he couldn’t bring himself to go in there.

Jason was tired, having not slept much the past few days and immediately passed out right when he’d crawled under the covers.

During the middle of the night, he heard the door open and immediately woke up. No matter how tired he was, he trained himself to always be alert, even when asleep. He switched on the lamp resting on the desk by his bed and looked to see who had entered his room.

There, he found a sleepy-eyed Dick, hugging a stuffed elephant close to his chest, standing at the door. His head peeked inside, almost as if he was scared to enter.

“What is it Dick?” Jason asked.

“I can’t sleep,” Dick mumbled. “C-Can I sleep with you?”

 _Oh fuck._ Jason really wanted to say yes but part of him was saying no. He couldn’t do this. Even if it was a younger Dick.

“Sorry kid.”

“B-But. I had a nightmare. I can’t sleep,” he whispered, voice trembling.

And Jason felt so bad for saying no.

“I’m sorry Dick. I-I don’t like sharing my bed.”

Dick let out a sigh but gave up in defeat. “Okay… I’ll go find Bruce instead.”

At the mention of Bruce’s name, Jason immediately stopped Dick as he was about to turn around. “Wait!”

Dick looked at him in confusion.

“Never mind. It’s fine. You can sleep with me.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes. Come in and close the door.”

Damn him for being jealous of Bruce and not wanting Dick to search for the man to lull him away from his nightmares.

Jason lifted up the covers to his bed and motioned for Dick to come on over. Dick beamed and closed the door shut, and headed straight for Jason. He slid into the spot right next to Jason and scooted up close to the man with his stuffed elephant, which was named Zitka, tugged close to his chest. Jason lowered the blanket on top of him and tucked him in as Dick cuddled him.

“What kind of nightmare did you have?” Jason asked, curious.

The room was dark but there was a little light shining in through the blinds. He could hear Dick shuffling around in bed as he turned onto his side to face Jason.

“Um. I can’t remember.”

“Oh. Well, can you describe the feeling?”

Dick hummed to himself as he thought about it. “Well…I couldn’t breathe. It felt like someone was suffocating me. I woke up gasping and I couldn’t go back to sleep.”

Jason stared down at Dick, his eyes adjusting to the darkness and could kind of make out the little frown on his face. Jason thought this could possibly be related to the incident. He remembered what Bruce had told him about the events of his death. How Lex Luthor had temporarily killed him to get the bomb out and then resuscitate him. Now that Jason thought about it, did Dick actually really die? Because Jason thought that they had only slowed down his heartbeat. If that was the case then, _oh god_. Jason didn’t even want to think about what actually happened to Dick.

“Jason.”

“Yeah?”

“D-Do you uh, do you hate me?”

Jason’s eyes widen and he was surprised to hear such a question. “Why do you ask that?”

“You just don’t seem to really like me?”

Jason was warned that children were more aware and sensitive to their surroundings and maybe kid Dick had caught on. As much as Jason tried to show his indifference to Dick, he had done his best to avoid him whenever possible and it looked like Dick had noticed.

Jason sucked in a breath before he answered, thinking carefully how to choose his words. “I don’t hate you. I’m mad at you.”

“Did older me do something?”

“Yeah he did.”

“Sorry. I’m sure I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

Jason doesn’t understand why little Dick would apologize to him because he wasn’t even mad at him in the first place. It was just so endearing how hard the little boy tried to make Jason feel better.

Jason leaned down and kissed his forehead. “It’s okay. You don’t need to apologize. I’ll let older you do that.”

“Did he say sorry though? Because if not, then well, older me needs to learn some manners.”

Jason chuckled. “Don’t worry. You said sorry. I was just mad and a simple sorry wasn’t going to cut it.”

“Was it something that bad that I did?”

Jason pondered on how he would be able to explain it to him without making it too complicated. Because yeah, what Dick had done was pretty fucked up. Despite the fact that it was Bruce’s idea, Dick still went along with it and didn’t even tell Jason. Or anyone in the family. Did they not trust them enough? Would it have hurt for them to know? Most likely not because they weren’t dumb enough to rat Dick out but whatever. It was still their wrong.

The best answer Jason could give was a yes.

Dick’s frown deepened and he buried his face against Jason’s chest. “I hate older me for hurting you.”

 _God._ Dick was too sweet and honestly, he wasn’t that much different than his older self. Always so understanding when needed. Dick did try to explain it to him but Jason was too angry to listen. It was partially his fault and maybe he should have gave him the opportunity.

As he thought about it, he let out a sigh. Yeah, he should have given Dick the chance but he was so mad and just thinking about him, seeing his face, made Jason want to lash out.

“Jason?”

“It’s okay kiddo. Don’t worry about it and just go to sleep.”

“Okay.”

Jason wrapped his arm around Dick and pulled him close. He stroked his head, running his hand gently down his soft hair.

“Good night Dick.”

“Night Jay.”

\------

When Jason had woken up the next morning, he was surprised to find a grown and naked Dick in his bed instead of tiny Dick. He frowned, missing the little cutie. But well, this Dick was beautiful too. His face looked peaceful as he slept, lips slightly parted and dark hair falling into his eyes. He was still clutching onto Zitka which was a hilarious view.

Jason couldn’t help but play with his hair, brushing his bangs aside so he could see more of his face. Then suddenly, Dick stirred awake, eyes blinking as his vision narrowed in on Jason. When they were fully open, the color of his face immediately drained. He shot up in bed and quickly got off.

“Fuck! Sorry! I-I don’t know why I’m here and – and I need – I need to go.”

Dick freaked out and bolted out of the room, completely naked before Jason could say a word. Jason sat in bed, confused as hell as he stared out the door Dick just left from. Dick was back but it looked like he didn’t remember anything based on his reaction.

“Fuck!”

Jason tossed the covers aside and got out of his bed. He followed Dick out of the room knowing exactly where he was going, his own room. When he found the man, Dick was wearing a pair of boxers now and frantically searching through his closet.

“Dick,” Jason called out and immediately, Dick’s whole body froze. The older man turned to face him and god, he looked like a complete disaster.

Dick’s face paled and he looked so flustered. His eyes were wide and frantically moving to and fro, as if he was looking for a way out. Jason closed the door behind him, to keep them both in. It was time they both stopped running away and confront each other.

Jason was about to call out to Dick again but the older man took a step back and then quickly bolted to the bathroom. The door slammed shut and he heard the lock go off.

Jason sighed. “Are you for real?” He walked right up to the bathroom door. “Come out Dick.”

“No!”

“Why not?”

“You said you didn’t want to see my face!”

 _Fuck._ So he really listened. But _of course_ he did. It was as if he completely _disappeared_ from his life.

“It’s fine. Just – Just come out.”

“ _No._ ”

“Dick! Let’s just talk about this…”

After a couple minutes of silence passed by, the door unlocked and Dick emerged from the bathroom. Jason handed him a shirt he had grabbed on the way over which Dick awkwardly took and dressed himself. He continued to stand there, unmoving and Jason had zero patience for this and grabbed his wrist and pulled them over to sit on the bed.

Once seated, Dick looked anywhere but at Jason and he noticed how much of a mess he had become since their breakup.

First things first.

“Do you remember anything?”

“Um. No?”

“Okay. Last thing you remembered?”

“Uh – well, I was out on patrol and got knocked with something.”

Jason pinched the bridge of his nose. So everything that happened when he was a kid had been completely forgotten about.

“Well, you were de-aged to a nine year old _again_. Had absolutely no memories past that.”

Dick gasped, in complete disbelief. “ _Oh._ That might be why I can’t remember why I’m here, at the manor. Also… why I was in your…bed,” he mumbled those last few words.

Well now that would be confusing to any man who had zero memories and found himself naked in his ex’s bed.

“Your kid version had a nightmare and wanted to sleep in my bed. And so I let him. I mean, we bonded a little so he was kind of attached to me oddly.”

“Oh. Okay.”

Dick took in that story in full stride and didn’t say anything else. But Jason could tell that he wanted to ask more seeing how twitchy he was. He was tapping his foot against the ground and twiddling his thumbs in his lap. He knew that Dick was eager to just leave and avoid everything.

But he wasn’t going to let him. After what his tiny self had said to him, Jason was determined that they talked out their issues.

“What happened when you were caught by the Crime Syndicate?”

“…What do you mean?”

“Okay, let me rephrase that. Tell me about your death.”

Dick froze a little, body going stiff but he answered anyways. “Well, Lex made me swallow a pill and then suffocated me. I kind of just blacked out so I can’t remember the details too well.”

Jason turned to look at him, knew that Dick still had his attention fixated on the ground. But he didn’t need to see his face to know that he was bothered. He could clearly see it in his body language, how tense his shoulders were and how fidgety he was.

“Did you pass out?”

“No. I just – I think I died for a few minutes. Before Lex resituated me.”

Jason eyes widen. “Wait. You died? Like really did?”

“Um. Yeah. I guess?”

“And you’re okay?”

“Well no. I mean, _I’m okay_ but I kind of have a bit of um – trauma about it.”

That seemed to explain some things.

“Do you get nightmares then?”

“On occasion.”

Jason slapped his forehead with his palm. He thought that it was all fake. After all, Dick did fake his death. When Bruce sprung the news on him, told him that Dick died and how he died, he didn’t think it was possible but then they had the ceremony and he was staring at Dick’s lifeless body. Only to have the man himself pop up, all ‘Hey guys! I’m alive again,’ because of course, he wouldn’t think anything was fake about that.

Jason never expected that Lex Luthor _really did kill him_. How could Bruce leave out such important detail? Because he was fucking Bruce Wayne.

Jason let out a heavy sigh and Dick twitched beside him.

“Um, are you okay?”

Jason looked at Dick in disbelief because of course, the idiot wouldn’t worry about himself. “Are _you_ okay?”

Dick shrugged his shoulders. “I’m fine.”

Jason bit his lip in frustration because he knew that Dick would react like that. “You know. It’s not fine that you died. Because I know what it’s like to die and I would never wish it upon anyone. I’m also sorry I never listened to you.”

Dick stayed quiet and didn’t pipe a word.

Jason decided to elaborate more, hoping that it would help to ease the rift between them. To clear up the tension and misunderstanding.

“I was just angry that you didn’t tell me and that you lied.”

“Sorry.”

Jason shook his head. “It’s not all your fault. I realize that now. I should be sorry for not considering the things you went through.”

“I mean, I didn’t want to do it but Bruce said it was dire. I just wanted to protect everyone, keep their identities safe because it’s not the best feeling when you’ve been unmasked to the entire world. I also wanted to keep you safe. During the whole time, I – I just wanted to come home but I couldn’t. I had a mission to fulfill and then things got out of hand so I came back and then well, things happened and then you all ended up hating me and – and it just felt…” Dick took in a shaky breath. “Awful.”

The corners of Jason’s lips turned into a frown. He hadn’t heard any of this before. Of how Dick felt about the whole thing. Ultimately it was his fault for not giving Dick the chance to explain. So of course he didn’t know. He couldn’t have even begun to understand the emotions building up within the older Robin.

“Sorry.”

“ _No._ It’s not your fault. I’m wrong. I mean, we’re both wrong but I’m also at fault.”

“…Do you hate me?”

Funny how he’d been asked the same question twice by the same person within a 12 hour period. “No Dickie. I don’t. I’m mad at you but I’m not as mad as before.”

“I,” he started, then paused, taking in a shaky breath. “Still love you.”

Jason frustratingly ran his hands over his face, rubbing his palm against his eyes. “ _Idiot,_ ” he said, then whispered “I do too.”

“Are we okay? Will we be okay?”

“In time, yeah.”

Finally, Dick turned to look at Jason. Their gazes met and Jason could see how tears glistened in those bright blue eyes.

“What are we going to do now?”

Good question. He thought about it for a moment. “Well, let’s start with an apology date. Where you’re paying. Followed by more apology dates. And you trying to win me all over again.”

A tiny smile graced Dick’s face, happy to know that Jason was willing to give him another chance.

“Are we allowed to kiss?”

Jason rolled his eyes. “Kisses are reserved.”

Dick frowned but decided to follow the rules anyways. But Jason couldn’t really resist Dick so he grabbed his hand and kissed it. Dick gaped at him, surprised.

“That’s all you get.” He smirked and Dick playfully swatted at him.

Jason still loved Dick and wanted them to be together so he was going to give their relationship a second chance. Because he knows in time, this will be a thing of the past.


End file.
